I’m scared

i think committmentscares me when i thinkabout it for too long;and i'm not talking aboutloyalty or always choosingthem over the temptation.i'm not talking exclusively about love or lust, but rather the committment tolast whether as friends, loversor some kind of meaningful yetdistant bond. how can someone thatstruggles to stay committedto themselves not be scaredof latching … Continue reading I’m scared

i hope you get used to the silence

a couple of drunken missed calls and a voicemaillater you've got mein your clutches again;you took away timethat i'll never get back,and now you're blaming me for being alone,void of companionshipand affection. i wish that someone had told me that it's not a sin to discard peoplewho wreak havocand play with your life as if … Continue reading i hope you get used to the silence

Or so the story goes

New Year, New Me,Or so the story goes;I'm tired of waiting for the Perfect moment to Erase the slate and startAfresh. I'm meandering aimlessly,Wasting moments of livingBy just existing in some bleakMindset where I'm craving toReinvent myself.I scam myself of progress,I steal time away from self-growthAnd sabotage the presentWith alluring thoughts of Future me holding … Continue reading Or so the story goes

She’s got a mean smile

She's got a mean smile,Hidden behind the angelic Façade people used toEncounter on first introductionsBut the mask has dropped nowAnd one is greeted withCalculated coldness Combined with distrust stemmingFrom cynicism that you'd beDifferent from everyone elseWho pledged to never bailOn her like that - Ouch. She's fearless now,Made to feel invincible As she knows she's … Continue reading She’s got a mean smile

Once she emerges

A/N Please be advised the following POV can be triggering. Sometimes everything seems to be getting better but then, out of nowhere, the sickening heavy feeling takes over my body. It feels like I'm trying to steer my life from the backseat, and catch glimpses of street names from the passenger side window. I feel … Continue reading Once she emerges